Review: Stuart Keane – Primitive: All Tied Up With String #5

Review: Stuart Keane – Primitive: All Tied Up With String #5


Genre: Horror
Publisher: Self-Published
Publication Date: 26th June 2017
Pages: 52




A copy of Primitive: All Tied Up With String #5 was sent to Confessions of a Reviewer by the author, Stuart Keane, in exchange for an honest review. This is said review.

Primitive: All Tied Up With String #5, is the fifth installment of Stuart Keane’s All Tied Up With String series. This one pays tribute, of a sort, to Nev Murray and one of his favorite foods: turkey dinosaurs!

Mr. Murray, a successful businessman who capitalized on the pre-packaged Murray’s Turkey Dinos, pays a visit to a man named Richard Banks. This boss brings secrecy and success to an all-new level. Undeterred by the risks, Murray asks to be involved in some of the . . . lesser known . . . aspects of Bank’s business dealings.

“. . . It’s not that I don’t trust you, but . . . well, I trust no one . . .”

Keane really displays his originality in this one, taking the story in a direction that would certainly have not been my first thought. Yet he pulls this off with sardonic humor, carnage, irony, and enough attention to detail to make it feel as though this could almost take place in a society such as our own.

One particular comedic break features a reporter and her cameraman, as aloof and utterly uninterested in the story they’re covering as the stereotypes they’re molded after.

“All kids are weird . . . Creepy lil’ f…ers.”

The resemblance of them to the news personalities of today is priceless, taking Keane’s dark sarcasm along with a moment of shock when the duo let part of their news story filter in past their self-centered worlds.

“Jesus . . . “

“He won’t help you . . . “

Unconcerned with the side effects of his business deal, Mr. Murray enjoys his elite status while he can. To be able to take a known person and place he or she into a story in such a convincing manner, makes for quite the treat for his readers. This was not simply a matter of throwing a name into a story that’s already been done. Stuart Keane went to great measures to insure a unique storyline, while adding enough details and explanations to make the situation nearly plausible.  The locations he uses, hired help, policies, and of course, the final deal, itself, give just enough validation for the readers to momentarily believe in his new world.

Primitive is a great addition to the All Tied Up With String line. Only, you may find yourself watching what you eat a little more steadily from now on . . .

Highly recommended!


General rating:


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Book Synopsis:

Mr Murray has a weird infatuation; the golden turkey dinosaur. A staple of his diet since childhood, the man is obsessed with evolving the criticised junk food into a more mainstream, healthy option. And, with some determination, he succeeds, only to be offered a lucrative business deal by his silent partner, the mysterious Mr Banks.

A business deal shrouded in absolute secrecy. An iron-clad contract that could have massive repercussions for the structure of society as we know it.

A one-time opportunity that could remove us from the top of the evolutionary food chain…




Stuart Keane is a person who, at a very young age, fell in love with the written word.

People ask me why I enjoy books. Sometimes I remain speechless. I know many people who have never read a book – they do exist – and trying to explain this simple, yet amazing pastime to them is never easy. It’s pretty difficult in fact.

I read my first adult book at age seven. This was years after seeing my first film but the experience, where new, was something else entirely. I remember being stuck on one page (for those who are curious, the book was Flesh by Richard Laymon, an excellent, yet under-appreciated horror writer) for half an hour because the detail in the scene was so vivid. I actually remember him describing an abandoned restaurant and I didn’t want to continue. It was THAT real to me that I felt I was actually there. Continuing to read would take me into the restaurant and because of previous events in the book, you knew it was a very bad idea.

This was my first memory of the written word. It’s remained with me since and probably always will. Many authors have that defining moment when they realised they wanted to write fiction for a living. This is mine and has shaped my life ever since.

So who is Stuart Keane?

Just an ordinary guy who likes to write thrilling, compelling stories. For thirty years, people have enthralled me, entertained me and provided me with many, many adventures. And inspiration. Now, I want to return the favour.

And for more about Stuart, visit his site or find him on social media:

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